More than ninety minutes
Dating a football fan is rarely about the ninety minutes. It is about everything around them: the Friday night check of the team news, the Saturday morning pre-match routine, the train to an away ground, the pint afterwards, the post-mortem on the way home and the slightly fragile mood on Sunday if things went badly. Football is a weekly event with a long build-up and a long tail.
If you are thinking about dating a supporter, or you are one and wondering how to explain yourself, read on for the reality, the good and the awkward, and where to find single supporters to begin with.
The calendar
The English season runs roughly from mid-August to late May, with Scottish football following a similar shape. Saturday 3pm is still the traditional kick-off, but televised matches move fixtures to Friday nights, Saturday lunchtimes, Sundays and Mondays. Then there are midweek league games, cup ties and, for clubs in Europe, Tuesday to Thursday nights. International breaks interrupt everything a few times a year, and the summer can bring a World Cup or a Euros.
What that means for a relationship is simple: plans often depend on the fixture list. A supporter with a season ticket may be busy every other weekend. One who goes away as well may be busy most weekends. One who mostly watches on television is more flexible, but still unlikely to agree to a dinner reservation during a derby.
None of this is a problem if you both know about it. It becomes a problem when it is a surprise.
The good parts
Football fans are often very good company.
Loyalty. Supporting a club through bad seasons takes patience and stubborn hope. Those qualities tend to show up in relationships too.
Community. Fans usually have a group of mates, family members or fellow season ticket holders they have known for years. Dating one often means being welcomed into that group.
Passion. Someone who can get that excited about a corner kick is not going to be boring company.
Something to share. If you enjoy the game too, it gives you a lifetime of things to do together, from away trips to sofa nights with a takeaway.
The harder parts
It is fair to be honest about these.
Time. Matchdays can take a whole day. Season tickets and away travel add up.
Money. Tickets, travel, shirts and subscriptions to watch on television are not cheap. It is worth being open about this early if finances are shared.
Moods. A bad result can cast a shadow over a weekend. Most fans know this about themselves and try to manage it; a few do not.
Clashes. Weddings, birthdays and family gatherings do not check the fixture list. Neither does Christmas, and Boxing Day football is a tradition many supporters will not give up.
Making it work
Couples where one or both people love football tend to get on best when they talk about time early. Some practical approaches:
- Agree which games matter most. The derby and a cup quarter-final may be sacred. A mid-table fixture in March may not be.
- Protect some time together. Keep one night a week, or Sunday lunch, out of football's reach.
- Share the calendar. When the fixtures come out in June, look at them together. It sounds unromantic. It saves a lot of arguments.
- Go together sometimes. Even a partner who does not love football may enjoy the atmosphere once in a while, especially at a smaller ground.
- Keep perspective. It is a game. A good partner can be gutted about a defeat and still be kind about it.
If you are the fan
If you are the supporter, be upfront. Put on your profile how many games you attend, whether you travel and how you are after a loss. Do not apologise for loving the game, but do show you understand it is not the only thing in a relationship. And if you are dating someone who is new to football, invite them in without testing them. Nobody enjoys a quiz about the offside rule on a second date.
How to meet single football fans
If you want to meet someone who loves football, there are plenty of places to start.
A football-first dating site. Everyone starts from the game, so the first conversation is easy. That is what Football Dating UK is for.
General apps, used well. Make football obvious in your photos and bio on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge or Match, and look for people who do the same. Our comparisons explain how football shows up on each.
Supporters' clubs and away travel. Club-recognised and fan-run supporters' clubs organise coaches, socials and meet-ups. Away days in particular are sociable.
Playing. Five-a-side, mixed leagues, walking football and women's teams are social as well as sporty.
The women's game. WSL and lower-league women's matches tend to be relaxed, with plenty of room to chat in the stands.
Non-league football. Smaller grounds, cheaper tickets and a friendly bar make it easy to talk to people. Many clubs rely on volunteers too.
Pub screenings. Big matches bring fans together. A busy pub is not the best place for a long conversation, but it is a good place to start one.
What to expect on a first date
Most first dates with football fans look like any other first date: a drink, a coffee, a walk. The game will probably come up. That is a good thing; it gives you something to talk about. If you are not a fan, ask questions. Why that club? What was the best match they ever saw? People love telling those stories, and how they tell them reveals a lot.
If you are both fans, resist the urge to spend the whole evening on transfer rumours. Talk about everything else too.
A match as a date
Going to a game together can be brilliant, but it is not always the best first date. It is loud, long and hard to talk through. Read first date at a football match before booking, and browse the date ideas for calmer alternatives.
When you support different clubs
Supporting rival teams can add spice or tension, depending on how you both handle it. Our guide to dating a rival fan covers derby days and ground rules. And if one of you does not like football at all, read when your partner hates football.
Staying safe
When you start meeting fans from a dating site, keep first dates public and plan your own travel, especially on matchdays. Never buy tickets through a stranger. See our safety page.
Ready to meet a fan?
Make your profile, say who you support or that you would love to date someone who does, and start a conversation. Signup Here or Sign in.
Signs you have found a good one
Some green flags worth noticing early: they ask about your week before talking about the result; they are honest about how many games they go to; they can laugh at their own club; they treat your plans as seriously as the fixture list; and they are kind to stewards, bar staff and opposition fans. A supporter who gets those right is likely to be good company for a long time.
The Monday after
Weekends end, but the result lingers. Give a fan the evening to process a defeat, then expect them to move on. Being patient for an hour and firm after that is a fair deal for both of you.